Redo of song "My Man" #lorijeanfinnila #singersongwriter #myman

A song that I was so inclined to redo!!! 

"So Grateful" #newsong #lyrics #lorijeanfinnila #singersongwriter #grateful

Photo by Řaj Vaishnaw from Pexels

"So Grateful" by Lori Jean Finnila

Verse

I look down at my boots below

as I felt my hands

touch the floor inside of me

remembering me on a floor just like this

on drugs

Chorus

I felt so grateful

as I anguished of that time

to have a home

as my after thought

away from it all

verse

My head would lift

in the dark, my groggy mind

to see things I shouldn't know

as girls disappear right before my eyes

Chorus

Verse

I cringe still today

of the sights

of the moments in my life

the fear still remains

Bridge

There's so much more to this

the girl's hand I held

still haunts me to this day

when I saw her go down

her body shook like I've known

Chorus

I felt so grateful

as I anguished of that time

to have a home

as my after thought

away from it all

Five Characteristics for Characters for the Movie "The Virtuous Woman" #richinwar #song #lorijeanfinnila #52FilmsByWomen

In “The Virtuous Woman,” that connects this story to the song “Rich in War,” I'm naming five characteristics of three characters that start the movie that I'm adding to that I wrote: The dad, the mom, and the grandmother – on the father's side.

They make the setup for the beginning of movie with trouble, later in strength, and ending in resolution for the main character of a young woman who had to leave home at 14 in the 50's named Celia. The bright eyed strawberry blond with light eyes was so eager to life but with many questions unanswered before she ventured the cruel world, sometimes making mistakes when she ventured out on her own but learning from them.

"Rich in War" video produced by Lori Jean Finnila. (The wars of woman.)

Dad: troubled because he was confused, flimsy in his decisions though he didn't see this, determined, insubstantial,

Mom: feeble, delicate, frail, fracturable shivery,

Grandmother: crisp, durable, unbreakable, consistent, able

Celia

Bound Little Girls Without Their Parents #scared #children #madeline #french #lorijeanfinnila #singersongwriter

I was able to get the lyrics lined up to what actually happened to me when I was taken at 17 taken by an abusive boyfriend at the time to an abortion clinic and bound without my parents along with many other little girls. One of my favorite French fairy tale books was "Madeline" given to me by my French grandmother. The smallest character in the book was Madeline. I was always so small because I almost died from convulsions when I was a toddler - I had a hard time eating and digesting food and wasn't growing after that for a long time.

I was in shock after I was drugged that day and had my baby taken from my body after its necked was cracked because I was too far along and thrown into a trash can when I was walked into a room with all these other little girls lined up perfectly exactly tucked into sleeping beds; I almost died from bleeding to death but one of the girls spooked at the counselor that was letting me bleed out so I got stuffed with a towel when the counselor had to second guess her action.

Illustration Courtesy Ludwig Bemelmans ( It looked French to me where my grandmother would make me walk straight and tall into our Catholic Church on Sundays dressed perfectly with white gloves down the main isle when I stayed over).

Ten Little Girls

Verse

there were ten little girls

abandoned

bound like in a jail

Chorus

Let me tell you my story

I'm the catholic girl

that didn't go away

Verse

There were ten little girls

that would never reveal

how they really feel

Chorus

Let me tell you my story

I'm the catholic girl

that didn't go away

Verse

There were ten little girls

lost in fairy tales

they were bound to be

sleeping beauties

Chorus

Let me tell you my story

I'm the catholic girl

that didn't go away

Verse

There were ten little girls

lined up in a row

tucked in beds

like my favorite fairy tale

There were sleeping little beauties

Ten little girls

ten little girls

Chorus

Ten little girls.......

2x

Chorus

Ten Little Girls #forcedabortion #song #lorijeanfinnila #fairytales #unreal #singersongwriter

The story of  my baby killed during a force abortion with all the other little girls there lined up with me with no parents forced against our wills.

Photo courtesy Karla Khodanian

Ten Little Girls

Verse
there were ten little girls
lost in fairy tales
they were bound like in a jail
lined up so unreal

Chorus
Let me tell you my story
of the catholic girl
that didn't go away

Verse
there were ten little girls
lined up in a row
never to reveal
how they really feel

Chorus
Let me tell you my story
of the catholic girl
that didn't go away

Verse
There were ten little girls
lost in fairy tales
like my favorite fairy tale
they were bound
to be sleeping beauties

Chorus
Let me tell you my story
of the catholic girl
that didn't go away

Verse
There were ten little girls
lost in fairy tales
like my favorite fairy tale
they were bound
to be sleeping beauties

Bridge
lined up in a row
laying like in a fairy tale
like little sleeping beauties


Ten little girls
ten little girls
Ten little girls.......

Brings back memories of me plucking on my pink plastic piano as a toddler..... #lorijeanfinnila #God #recording #freemusic

Though I felt close to God when being beaten close to death during abuse from my stalker I prayed for him to let me remain. Please feel free to download the song as well as the others under the "Am I Awake" album leaving it as .0 cents.

Close to God by Lori Jean Finnila

Brings back memories of me plucking on my pink plastic piano as a toddler the piano sounding like bells, fairies....

Image by pixel1 at Pixabay.

Close to God lyrics

Verse
I'm up one more day
The sun is shining
though I don't feel
as connected as others do
I'm still so grateful

Bridge
I feel I have much to do
I feel his message
I  fight to put into words
the meaning of my existence

Chorus
I feel so close to God
But I don't want to reach him too soon
Please tell him to love me
And let me remain

Verse
Another Sunday I can't make it to church
though I connect with those that perish
on a daily basis

Chorus
I feel so close to God
But I don't want to reach him too soon
Please tell him to love me
And let me remain

So close to God......
I feel so close to God

I Hold My Breath Before I Speak #abuse #lorijeanfinnila #singersongwriter #freemusic

My Odyssey

You take everything, from me

my food, a place to sit

As I sit closed

in the window

I hold tight to my odyssey

to my wars

until I return home

return home

My choices are limited

I hold my breath

before I speak, move, or make a decision

How is this lucky?

(I know we've all felt this before.) #lorijeanfinnila #singersongwriter #freemusic #COVID19 #relief

"My Odyssey" by Lori Jean Finnila

Image by Pexels from Pixabay.

"Flying" #recording #lorijeanfinnila #singersongwriter #freemusic #dandelions

I finally found a universal song in all the mess in my mind. It's certainly not that it came from mess, but, alas, I was able to convert it for everyone universally. Make it into what you want in your mind.

Much love.

Lori Jean Finnila

Flying (free music) Still not in the studio, so bear with me. This came out pretty good too though.

Photo by Comfreak at Pixabay.

Recording "Am I Awake" #newsong #lorijeanfinnila #singersongwriter

I wrote this album from pain but in a universal way. I just added the final for now of "Am I Awake" making the album name this track. I hope you enjoy it.

Am I Awake

Am I Awake #new #lyrics #lorijeanfinnila #singersongwriter

I thought to pick this song up and publish it after listening to a song by Ed Sheeran where I could connect with my lyrics, yet subside its actual content where it can be universal. I'm glad I did and another learning step toward my music.

Am I Awake

Verse

I know you want me or control me

I just want to put it away

and get lost in the music....

Chorus

Am I here

Am I awake

I take one step away

and I don't feel the pain

Verse

I feel it would be better

to let go of the past

and make beauty of a bad situation

Chorus

Am I here

Am I awake

I take one step away

and I don't feel the pain

Am I really here

I'm in shock again

Am I awake

Or am I dreaming

Verse

We fight to keep it quiet

but why do we have to do this

blood bursts till it spills over

quiet screams to no one

Chorus

Album Cover

Photo by Gerd Altmann at Pixabay.